The Road to Vienna

Translation: "A sign with the Austrian flag, this must be the way to Vienna!"
Austrians in the countryside tend not to be crazy about the Viennese, espcially when driving.

Sample Dialogue #8

Patriotic Austrian Easter Eggs
are much easier to dye than American
ones.

In class, during a lesson on holidays.

Scott: Can anybody explain why we celebrate Easter?
Student: Easter is the day when Jesus stood up and drove to heaven.
Scott: With the bus or with the car?

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Aufstehen -  "to arise/to stand up"
die Himmelfahrt - "the Ascension," more literally, "heaven drive"

Miscommunication - Pi Day Edition

Pi Day - The day when math teachers
attempt to reconcile Americans' love of
pie with their hatred of math.

For those who didn't realize, yesterday was Pi Day, so called because it was March 14, or 3.14 - the first three digits of pi.  I tried to explain this to one of my teachers and I failed for the following revealing reasons:

1. Austrians, and Europeans in general, write dates "backwards" (to Americans).  Thus yesterday was 14.3 and not 3.14.
2. Austrians don't really ever think about pie.  They're proud of their cakes and would probably never be caught dead with a slice of Mrs. Smith's PreBaked Dutch Apple Crumb Pie, even though Apfelstrudel is more or less the same thing.
3. Even if you met an Austrian who, despite all odds, loved both pie and geometry, he wouldn't even get the pun, as pi is not even pronounced the same way in German.  It's pronounced like "pee" and somehow "Pee Day" is just not as appealing.
4. Austrians, to generalize, just don't understand puns.  It's why Austrian crosswords are so inferior and about 20% as difficult.

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And in honor of Pi Day, today's word is unendlich, which means, predictably, "infinite."
  

Denglish = Deutsch + English - Proofreading

Although I freely admit that my students are usually quite proficient in English (in many ways better than I am in German), they do regularly make a few mistakes that sometimes make me smile and sometimes make me cringe.

"What did you do this weekend?"
"On Friday I made lots of party and all day Saturday I learned English."

"What did you do for Valentine's Day?"
"I was by my boyfriend and I become chocolates from her."

"Can you German?"
"I cannot.  Can you English?"

"Nice to meet you." (upon >10th time meeting you)

"What did you do this morning?"
"I stood up at 6:30 and then I drove with the bus to school."

"And you?"
"I also."

These mistakes tend to make sense when translated literally from German, but sound rather comical in English.  Hearing "Denglish" is usually a sign that language learners are still thinking in their native language and then trying to translate in their head, which is certainly not the most effective way to speak a new language, although I too am guilty of it.  Especially when I say things like, "Ich will morgen meinen Freund in Wien besuchen/I want to visit my boyfriend in Vienna tomorrow!"

Sample Dialogue #6

Two quotes of note from the classroom today.  In English.

Scott: So what does it mean if the president is "impeached" in America? 
Student: It's like when the president is arrested.
Scott: Sort of, do you know who the last president to be impeached was?
Student: Gaddafi?

Scott: Do you like the snow? [context: it's snowing today]
Student: Not really.  I want spring to come.
Scott: When does spring begin in Austria?
Other Student: Every year.

putschen - to revolt

Sample Dialogue #4

In an electronics store in Amstetten, in German.  Mistake (and irony) realized after the fact.

Friendly Cashier: You're from Austria, are you?
Me: No I'm not.  I'm from America.  I'm on my way to Linz.
Friendly Cashier: Wow, your German is quite good.
Me: Thank you.
Friendly Cashier: Well, I hope you have a nice vacation here in Austria!
Me: You too!
Friendly Cashier: [silent retraction of compliment]

Other Misunderstandings

The number funny of misinterpretations I encounter in Austria grows daily.  The latest is related to the environmental crisis in Hungary (left), which is called Giftschlamm by German-language newspapers.  When I first heard this word I knew that "gift" meant "poison" (interesting?), and I assumed that "schlamm" was equivalent to the English "slam," meaning that the red sludge in Hungary was a "Poison Slam."  Although Poison Slam would be a great name for a SNES video game or death metal band, "Giftschlamm" actually means dangerous mud or sludge, as I was recently disappointed to find out.

Another example is related to emergency exits, which are called Notausgang in German.  When I first arrived, I knew that "ausgang" meant "exit," but not knowing what the prefix "not" really meant, I thought signs for a "Notausgang" meant that a given door was not an exit.  This could have been a very unfortunate misunderstanding indeed.

Luckilzy, European exit signs are more universal than American ones in that they use no written language and therefore they are obvious to illiterates, kindergarteners, and even intelligent animals.  Plus they're green, which may keep people calm during an actual emergency.  Slate has a lengthy and comprehensive article on this topic (here), but beware its length and comprehensivity.  

As a final note, I'm headed to Prague for the weekend to celebrate my extended "Austria Day" holiday in another country.  I'll be back on in Waidhofen on Tuesday.